Tag: personal

Testing My Patience: My Struggle Obtaining my A1c

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People with diabetes understand the significance of a hemoglobin A1c test well. It provides information about an individual’s average levels of blood glucose over three months. While diabetes is about much more than numbers, an A1c reading is still important because it is one of the main points of discussion between an endocrinologist and a patient. It helps an endo determine how a patient is managing diabetes and can help direct course of treatment.

This test is a big deal, but the actual process of having it done is one of the simpler aspects of diabetes care and management. Historically, all I’ve had to do is show up to my endo’s lab the week of an appointment, write my name/date of birth/insurance provider/whether I’m fasting on a sheet of paper, and walk into the lab to have a small needle inserted into a vein located in my upper forearm. I have zero aversion to needles or blood, so it doesn’t hurt and takes less than five minutes. And it’s always mildly entertaining that every phlebotomist I’ve encountered feels the need to comment on how nice and visible my veins are – one even went so far as to call one of them beautiful! (My response: um, thanks?!)

Since my A1c blood work has been so quick, easy, and (relatively) painless in the past, I was anticipating it to go smoothly once again when I recently went into the lab one Sunday morning. But I didn’t have such luck. Moments after signing in, the receptionist informed me that they could not perform the blood draw. Nonplussed, I politely asked why not. She told me that the lab hadn’t received the orders from my endo. I explained that I would be seeing my doctor in just a few days and that this was a routine part of the process. She did her best to help me by making a couple phone calls to other suites in the medical facility, but it was to no avail. I was frustrated but walked out, accepting that I would need to call my endo’s office first thing the following Monday to figure out why my orders had not been sent to the lab.

Early that Monday morning, I received a message from a nurse who works in my endo’s office. She apologized for my inconvenience over the weekend, and let me know that she submitted orders for lab work for all future appointments for the rest of the year. That was great and all, but I still had to find time to get lab work completed for my upcoming appointment. I couldn’t go on Monday, but I carved out some time in my schedule at work to go back on Tuesday morning.

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The patient’s perspective: too much time spent waiting

I was flustered when I walked into the lab for the second time in three days, because it had taken me twice as long to get there due to local road work. I told myself to relax, it would be done in a couple minutes and then I could head back to work with this task checked off from my to-do list. But…of course it wasn’t, because upon entering the lab, the receptionist told me that the power was down and they would be unable to complete my blood work.

For a couple seconds, I just stood there while I let that sink in. I explained how I was rejected on Sunday and practically begged her, please, isn’t there anything you can do? Despite having access to both my medical history AND the orders on her computer, she said no, but I could try one of the two other “near” lab locations. Completely exasperated, I told her no, that I guess I’d have to try again tomorrow, and walked away with tears stinging my eyes. I was mad that I wasted another trip, confused as to why this was so difficult, and defeated by the lack of understanding from the receptionists.

The bottom line is that I have a few questions after experiencing all this:

  1. How come my lab orders weren’t submitted?
  2. Why did I let this affect me emotionally?
  3. Why does everything about diabetes management have to be so complicated?

While I don’t have an answer right now to the first question, I intend on finding out how the slip-up occurred. And my answer to the second question, I think, is tied to my response to the third one: Diabetes management is hard. I try my best every single day and deal with the curveballs that are thrown my way. But lately, diabetes is like a pesky gnat, flying around my head so it’s always in my line of sight and incessantly buzzing to keep my attention. It’s annoying as hell and gets in the way of living my life. So to have something that’s normally easy, something that barely even requires me to think about my diabetes, become so complicated is just ANNOYING.

The one positive result from this whole ordeal? My A1c was better than I expected. Thank goodness.

Cardio Workouts, Stink Bugs, and Diabetes

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…What could those three things possibly have to do with each other?

Turns out, a lot more than you think. At least, if your name is Molly, you have diabetes, you do workouts in the mornings, and on top of all that, you have a paralyzing fear of bugs.

All of these things created a bit of a perfect storm last week during the early morning hours. My day started out normally: My alarm blared at 6:15, I rolled out of bed, changed into exercise clothes, and hit the play button on my DVD player. I completed a grueling half hour “Total Body Cardio Fix”, a series of exercises that are a part of the 21 Day Fix program. By the end of the workout, I was sweating profusely, but proud of myself for keeping up with this relatively new addition into my morning routine.

I proceeded getting ready (take shower, get dressed, do make-up). Towards the end of my make-up application, as I was blending concealer under my eyes in an attempt to cover up the dark circles, I happened to spot something on my carpet out of the corner of my eye. I hunched down to take a closer look and initially though it was a clump of stray threads on my floor – but I very quickly discovered it was something else. A nasty, ugly stink bug!!! Ugh, I hate those things. They’re so icky to look at, they FLY, and they release a horrible odor when you smoosh them. There is legitimately nothing to appreciate about them.

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My hyper-realistic rendering of what stink bugs look like. Those little squiggles represent their malodorous manner. The evil expression, though, is pure speculation on the artist’s part, as she has never gotten close

If you know me well enough, you know that I have what my parents kindly refer to as the “bug scream”. That’s how much I dislike creepy crawlies of all varieties. So as it dawned on me that I was looking right at one, I blood-curdling one escaped my lips and I ran as fast as I could out of my room. Unfortunately, though, I had to scamper back in to grab my test kit, PDM, and CGM so I could figure out what to do while I had my breakfast.

As I paced back and forth in the kitchen, trying to come up with a bug elimination stratagem, I heard a “BUZZBUZZBUZZ” from the other room. No, it wasn’t another bug – thanks heavens for that – but it was my CGM. The combination of early morning cardio and bug-induced mania must’ve done the trick. So there I was, in my absolute prime (not!): shaking, sweating, and most probably looking like a crazy person as I blended a breakfast shake together. Not cute.

Of course, the blood sugar issue was taken care of pronto. The bug issue, however? That was addressed. Eventually…

…meaning that my mother was my savior and eliminated the BUGger (sorry for the terrible pun*) later that evening. Thanks, mom.

 

*Not actually sorry for terrible puns because I love all puns!!!

It’s the Holiday Season!!!

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Only 21 more days until Christmas! I’m so excited that the most wonderful time of year is here. To celebrate, I’ve changed the header on my site to…

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…this dorky T1D dancing lady (me)!!!

It was like kismet when I saw this sweater in the store a few days ago. It’s a cactus that lights up and has the phrase “hug me” on it. How could I not buy it?! Hence, I decked myself out with the sweater and danced gleefully with my OmniPod PDM in hand to bring some Christmas cheer to my type 1 diabetes blog, Hugging the Cactus.

I want to take a moment to say how special HtC is to me. Truly, the first two months I’ve spent putting this blog together and writing new material have brought me, in the spirit of the season, joy. It makes me so happy to share with readers, near and far, who take time out of their days to click through my posts. I’ve learned quite a bit from the DOC in the years that I’ve spent blogging, and I know that I will continue to do so!

Besides the holidays this month, I’ve got a major milestone coming up: 20 years with type 1 diabetes as of December 24th. What do you think I should do to mark the occasion?

Again, thank you for reading my blog. I have some big plans in the works for it in 2018, so stay tuned! And if you want to make sure that you don’t miss any of my new posts, please feel free to subscribe – the widget to subscribe is located on the right-hand side menu on the homepage here.

Christmas time is here!!!

A Shout Out to my Endocrinologist

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For the first two weeks of Diabetes Awareness Month, I’m responding to prompts provided by Beyond Type 1 on Twitter (and I’ll post a couple longer responses here). Today’s prompt encourages us to give a shout out to a healthcare provider who has made a difference in our lives. I’m not disclosing the name of my endo for privacy purposes, but that doesn’t diminish the amount of gratitude I have for her.

Dear Endocrinologist,

Thank you.

Thank you for always listening to me during our appointments.

Thank you for making me feel heard and never laughing at the problems I brought up that I thought were stupid or embarrassing.

Thank you for never making me feel bad about my A1c.

Thank you for reminding me that my A1c is just a number, and I’m worth more than what that value represents.

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Waiting for my endocrinologist at a recent appointment

Thank you for motivating me to take better care of myself after every appointment I have with you.

Thank you for being patient with me.

Thank you for inspiring me to try new technology, and not judging me when I used to express my fears about abandoning the known for the unknown.

Thank you for asking me questions, in an effort to make sure you fully understood my thoughts and feelings about my health.

Thank you for being you.

Sincerely,

Molly

 

Memory Monday: It’s Time to Learn About Diabetes!

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One Monday per month, I’ll take a trip down memory lane and reflect on how much diabetes technology, education, and stigma has changed over the years. Remember when…

…”It’s Time to Learn About Diabetes” came out on VHS, with a workbook to accompany it?

Oh, the ’90s. What a time to be alive. Nickelodeon was in its prime, boy bands and Britney Spears were all the rage, and VHS tapes preceded DVDs and Blu-Rays as the way to watch movies. In 1995, one particular VHS tape conveniently debuted one year after my diagnosis that quickly became one of my most-watched tapes of that decade:

“It’s Time to Learn About Diabetes” told the tale of two fellow ’90s kids, Cindy and Mike. This 20 minute video walked viewers through diabetes basics and it couldn’t be more supremely cheesy. I’m certain that if I were to unearth the tape today (and a VCR to play it, to boot), I would cringe for the duration of it.

This video definitely shows its age…
…which is approximately 22 years old.

It’s been about 20 years (!!!) since I last watched the tape, but here’s what I remember about it: 1) mentions of NPH and regular; 2) the kids playing on a playground when one of them experiences a low blood sugar; 3) tacky illustrations of beta cells (I think that’s what they were, anyways); 4) 60-second meter countdowns; 5) zero inclusion of insulin pumps or CGMs, because they weren’t invented yet; 6) no explanation of the difference between T1D and T2D (for that matter, I don’t think T2 was mentioned at all); and 7) really bad you’re-about-to-learn-yay-for-education-in-the-’90s introductory music.

I’m really selling this tape here, huh? In all honesty, it wasn’t a bad way for me to really understand my diabetes at a young age. After all, how many other small children do you know that can tell you what the purpose of a pancreas is? It was a different way to present vital information I needed to know and clearly, it stuck with me pretty well.

I guess it just resonates more strongly than ever with me today because it’s a reminder of how much technology and the way information is presented has changed since my diagnosis. The Internet was still pretty new when I was diagnosed, and smartphones didn’t even exist yet. Just as phones and computers were bulky and slow in those days, so was the DTech at my disposal. 20 years later, though, information is readily available at our fingertips. It’s incredibly fast and detailed, and as technology evolves, it continues to become even more streamlined. In this way, I’m glad to have been exposed to the technology, both medical and otherwise, of the ’90s: because it makes me grateful for the incredible improvements we’ve experienced since then.

Welcome to my Blog!

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I couldn’t be more excited to start this new – and mildly daunting – venture in blogging. While I’m no stranger to sharing my diabetes story with others online, it’s a bit more intimidating to craft my own blog and show a more personal side of myself.

In fact, if you had told me 10 years ago that I would be a diabetes blogger who’s connected with T1Ds all across the country, I would have looked at you like you were absolutely insane. I was already accustomed to a life with diabetes in my teenage years, but that didn’t mean I was willing to talk about it. I shunned the notion of attending diabetes camp or meeting other peers with T1D. I figured that the only other T1Ds I needed in my life were my mom and my aunt – their support was enough for me.

This point of view changed, though, just before I started my freshman year at college. Suddenly, I was all too aware of the fact that I’d be forced to take full responsibility of my diabetes care and management for the first time in my life. College meant a true taste of independence, and with that came accountability for my health. This realization made me accept that perhaps I should welcome some additional support into my life.

That’s when the College Diabetes Network entered the picture. A quick search online brought me to this incredible nonprofit. After learning that a chapter existed at my school, I made it my goal to give it a try and go to a meeting. Little did I know that over the course of the next three years, I would become the president of this chapter and register it as a student organization on campus.

Hi. That’s me, attending my first CDN Retreat and basking in the endless amounts of diet coke available there.

My involvement with the CDN has provided me with many opportunities. I’ve attended conferences and gained internship experiences due to my connection to the CDN. I’ve met dozens of people like me all across the country – individuals looking for peer support as we navigate the tricky world of diabetes, college, the real world, and young adulthood. Hearing stories both similar to and different from my own never fails to make an impact on me, and the inspiration I draw from others gives me the courage to make my voice heard within and outside the diabetes community.

In fact, my openness over sharing my diabetes resulted in my blog’s title: Hugging the Cactus. Anyone who knows me knows that I wear an OmniPod insulin pump and a Dexcom CGM. As I rotate sites around my body, this means that I sometimes wear them in plain sight. On a particular evening, I was wearing one on the back of each arm. I had made a trip to the restroom at a restaurant and was walking back to my table when a not-so-shy waiter asked me, politely, “What are those things on your arms?”

“Oh, it’s my insulin pump and my glucose monitor. I have type one diabetes and these help me manage it,” I explained, in a patient tone.

“Oh, I’m sorry – that’s terrible,” the waiter replied. Remorse appeared in his expression.

“Please don’t apologize,” I said to him, reassuringly. “I’ve had diabetes most of my life. I accept it and I’m grateful for these devices. They make it much easier to take care of myself.”

“That’s pretty cool, you know,” he said, his face changing. He smiled at me. “It’s like your hugging the cactus. Accepting the bad for what it is and embracing it.”

I remember flashing him a giant smile and laughing as I said, “I like that. That’s exactly what it is.” He wished me a good evening, which I reciprocated, before parting ways. I cemented the phrase “hugging the cactus” into my memory that night, because it sums up my perspective on life with diabetes perfectly.

And this is why I’m here: to share my stories with others, as well as to hear your stories. It’s my humble hope to positively impact the life of someone who deals with diabetes, directly or indirectly. Whether we share the same feelings or completely different ones regarding diabetes, I think it’s wonderful to be part of the diabetes community and share in the strength, knowledge, and sense of belonging found within it.